The Capacity to Be Alone Is the Capacity To love
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Date: 2023-09-15
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Comments and reviews: 20
Zak
I always felt that cohabitation was not for me. I think this part of me is born and raised. I've had some short relationships and a few situationships but they never materialized into an LTR. And frankly, I saw the whole socializing phase always as something I had to munch through than that I actually enjoyed it. So yeah, no kids either. right? Well I became a so-called known sperm donor for a woman I already knew. No relationship, but that's fine. I'm in contact with them and slowly building a bond with my now 1yo kid. I support them when necessary. She has legal custody and responsibility. In practice I'm a 'father-light'. I realize this construction is not for everyone, but it works for me. And we're going to try for a second.
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I always felt that cohabitation was not for me. I think this part of me is born and raised. I've had some short relationships and a few situationships but they never materialized into an LTR. And frankly, I saw the whole socializing phase always as something I had to munch through than that I actually enjoyed it. So yeah, no kids either. right? Well I became a so-called known sperm donor for a woman I already knew. No relationship, but that's fine. I'm in contact with them and slowly building a bond with my now 1yo kid. I support them when necessary. She has legal custody and responsibility. In practice I'm a 'father-light'. I realize this construction is not for everyone, but it works for me. And we're going to try for a second.
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Mawaris
This summer I learned that I don't need the recognition of everyone around me. I sought the presence of others because I felt alone to a point that was draining. So I packed my things and got on the train to do things I was afraid of and didn't want to do alone (visiting the cinema, going to the beach, going to a convention, entering a karaoke contest, . Let me tell you, i never felt so free in my life just doing things I never imagined being able to do alone. It opened my eyes that I shouldn't be dependent on anyone and enjoy life.
I had the fear of being a lone wolf but I don't care anymore. I enjoy my time now alone and I love it. Just do what you want to do and live your life to the fullest.
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This summer I learned that I don't need the recognition of everyone around me. I sought the presence of others because I felt alone to a point that was draining. So I packed my things and got on the train to do things I was afraid of and didn't want to do alone (visiting the cinema, going to the beach, going to a convention, entering a karaoke contest, . Let me tell you, i never felt so free in my life just doing things I never imagined being able to do alone. It opened my eyes that I shouldn't be dependent on anyone and enjoy life.
I had the fear of being a lone wolf but I don't care anymore. I enjoy my time now alone and I love it. Just do what you want to do and live your life to the fullest.
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Name
Honestly when my relationship came to an end, the solitude initially made me uncomfortable as I'd never been truly by myself before; even in my worst moments I always had someone to cling to so for the first few months, and during a protracted period of pain, I hated being alone. Two years later and I couldn't be happier in my own company, I've found myself falling back in love with my hobbies, with the quiet & peace.
Unfortunately some of my family equate being alone with loneliness but it's not that for me, I adore the serenity of quietness; I'm alone but not lonely, my soul is content in a way it never was before
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Honestly when my relationship came to an end, the solitude initially made me uncomfortable as I'd never been truly by myself before; even in my worst moments I always had someone to cling to so for the first few months, and during a protracted period of pain, I hated being alone. Two years later and I couldn't be happier in my own company, I've found myself falling back in love with my hobbies, with the quiet & peace.
Unfortunately some of my family equate being alone with loneliness but it's not that for me, I adore the serenity of quietness; I'm alone but not lonely, my soul is content in a way it never was before
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Mentally
i'm always alone and lonley. no talks to me, no asks me to hangout with them and when i do ask someone out they just look at me and walk off whiles talking abt me behind my back. But whenever i do go outside my anxitey starts to become uncontrolable cause i know fall well everone is looking at me like i'm some monster and then before i know it everyone starts to be scared of me cause of bad my mental state has gotten over time and now it's getting worse every second. I want the pain and suffering to stop all i want is to loved but now it seems impossible. (srry for the vent)
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i'm always alone and lonley. no talks to me, no asks me to hangout with them and when i do ask someone out they just look at me and walk off whiles talking abt me behind my back. But whenever i do go outside my anxitey starts to become uncontrolable cause i know fall well everone is looking at me like i'm some monster and then before i know it everyone starts to be scared of me cause of bad my mental state has gotten over time and now it's getting worse every second. I want the pain and suffering to stop all i want is to loved but now it seems impossible. (srry for the vent)
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Tanay
As of late, I've been actualising how to love people without feeling alone. Sharing food, cracking lame jokes, being a better friend to someone, being a better listener, and so much more. I've been single for quite sometime and honestly, the love I feel right now feels so much safer and wholesome than anything I've felt in my romantic relationships so far. And then, there are these hobbies like music, writing and being inspired by art, that I live for. I'm 26, and plan to stay single for as long as I can. At the same time, I want to love as much as I can!
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As of late, I've been actualising how to love people without feeling alone. Sharing food, cracking lame jokes, being a better friend to someone, being a better listener, and so much more. I've been single for quite sometime and honestly, the love I feel right now feels so much safer and wholesome than anything I've felt in my romantic relationships so far. And then, there are these hobbies like music, writing and being inspired by art, that I live for. I'm 26, and plan to stay single for as long as I can. At the same time, I want to love as much as I can!
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h y
I love being alone and choosing to live a solitary life. My only regret is that I didn't realize it when I was younger. Like most kids, I desired to be liked, to be 'cool', to be like everyone else. Trying to be like that caused me ALOT of grief over the years, but it's helped me learn and realize that it's perfectly fine to want and like to be alone. I enjoy coming home to my pets and no other people. I enjoy being able to decide when I would like to be around and interact with people, (friends, family, etc) To me, Alone=peace of mind=happiness
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I love being alone and choosing to live a solitary life. My only regret is that I didn't realize it when I was younger. Like most kids, I desired to be liked, to be 'cool', to be like everyone else. Trying to be like that caused me ALOT of grief over the years, but it's helped me learn and realize that it's perfectly fine to want and like to be alone. I enjoy coming home to my pets and no other people. I enjoy being able to decide when I would like to be around and interact with people, (friends, family, etc) To me, Alone=peace of mind=happiness
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Deven
I don't mind being alone but I have a hard time letting go of the girl I liked when I was in highschool. My heart was in the right place but not my mind as I mistreated her at times by over texting, not giving her enough space, saying some mean things I should not have that I never actually meant but can't take back, etc. Admittedly, I became obsessed with her yet I am sorry for my conduct around her and I never got to fully apologize so that's why the whole situation still haunts me several years later since last seeing and talking to her.
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I don't mind being alone but I have a hard time letting go of the girl I liked when I was in highschool. My heart was in the right place but not my mind as I mistreated her at times by over texting, not giving her enough space, saying some mean things I should not have that I never actually meant but can't take back, etc. Admittedly, I became obsessed with her yet I am sorry for my conduct around her and I never got to fully apologize so that's why the whole situation still haunts me several years later since last seeing and talking to her.
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Astro
Ive heard this advice before and its dead on every time.
So many people make memes about how being lonely drives you insane.
I always felt that they were inferring they had no tolerance for solitude. Which I think everybody needs.
Like you said, everyone needs to have a self they love in order for others to love them.
And love isnt a feeling, necessarily. Its an action: unconditional acceptance and care for a human being. That starts, often, with yourself.
If you cant love yourself, how can you love another self?
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Ive heard this advice before and its dead on every time.
So many people make memes about how being lonely drives you insane.
I always felt that they were inferring they had no tolerance for solitude. Which I think everybody needs.
Like you said, everyone needs to have a self they love in order for others to love them.
And love isnt a feeling, necessarily. Its an action: unconditional acceptance and care for a human being. That starts, often, with yourself.
If you cant love yourself, how can you love another self?
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BadWolf77
There s something special about the ability live alone and be comfortable with it. You literally have to push past Society constantly telling people that, we cannot live alone, we re social creatures. It took me years to become happy by myself but now, I could never go back to the co-dependency of relationships. To give up all the freedoms I enjoy now for too much drama and anxiety.
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There s something special about the ability live alone and be comfortable with it. You literally have to push past Society constantly telling people that, we cannot live alone, we re social creatures. It took me years to become happy by myself but now, I could never go back to the co-dependency of relationships. To give up all the freedoms I enjoy now for too much drama and anxiety.
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Rikitiki
1: 21 Sweet merciful heavens I HATE paradoxes. Why can't anything about emotions and human relationships make any gosh-darned sense!
That being said, let logic be silent when experience gainsays its conclusions and all that. Self-love is really hard for some of us, but it's something we have to at least work toward, even if we never really arrive there.
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1: 21 Sweet merciful heavens I HATE paradoxes. Why can't anything about emotions and human relationships make any gosh-darned sense!
That being said, let logic be silent when experience gainsays its conclusions and all that. Self-love is really hard for some of us, but it's something we have to at least work toward, even if we never really arrive there.
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Mys
I don't understand why people think being alone equals to loneliness or sadness. Since I was a kid I always prefer being alone. I'd rather be in tranquil silence than be with superficial negative people. I chose to go solo in life and I've never regretted that decision. I find happiness, contentment and often nuggets of wisdom in silence, peace and solitude.
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I don't understand why people think being alone equals to loneliness or sadness. Since I was a kid I always prefer being alone. I'd rather be in tranquil silence than be with superficial negative people. I chose to go solo in life and I've never regretted that decision. I find happiness, contentment and often nuggets of wisdom in silence, peace and solitude.
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AuroraPhoenixJ4499
I don't ever feel lonely being alone, more comfortable and at peace. When you've healed your inner core, the inner child and made peace with childhood wounds, put the fractured pieces back together like a puzzle, you feel a sense of wholeness and completion within yourself.
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I don't ever feel lonely being alone, more comfortable and at peace. When you've healed your inner core, the inner child and made peace with childhood wounds, put the fractured pieces back together like a puzzle, you feel a sense of wholeness and completion within yourself.
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MetalDeathMusic
I love my alone time. 90 percent of the time I'm just fine by myself, but the problem is I am, and have pretty much always been alone. I don't want to be alone forever, and it's that 10 - 15 percent of time, where I really wish I had another soul to walk with.
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I love my alone time. 90 percent of the time I'm just fine by myself, but the problem is I am, and have pretty much always been alone. I don't want to be alone forever, and it's that 10 - 15 percent of time, where I really wish I had another soul to walk with.
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nomnom
Loneliness does not come from having no people around you, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to you. - Carl Jung
Remember, you always have yourself whenever you need, where-ever you go, whatever happens.
you are fine.
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Loneliness does not come from having no people around you, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to you. - Carl Jung
Remember, you always have yourself whenever you need, where-ever you go, whatever happens.
you are fine.
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Asuka
Solitude isn't about loneliness; it's a state of reflection of understanding oneself.
As someone who is comfortable with solitude, this quote hits me hard because it is TRUE. I always keep this in mind when I wonder why I choose to be alone all the time.
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Solitude isn't about loneliness; it's a state of reflection of understanding oneself.
As someone who is comfortable with solitude, this quote hits me hard because it is TRUE. I always keep this in mind when I wonder why I choose to be alone all the time.
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Z0neXD
Like an inscription I saw on a Minecraft server once said: One must know the bitter cold to appreciate the heat of a flame
-I don t know who to crest for it so I ll just say the Monks who run the monastery it was in
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Like an inscription I saw on a Minecraft server once said: One must know the bitter cold to appreciate the heat of a flame
-I don t know who to crest for it so I ll just say the Monks who run the monastery it was in
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Roger
I once believed that the worst thing in the world was being alone, but the truth is there are worse things than that. One of those is being around people who make you feel that way. I know this from experience.
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I once believed that the worst thing in the world was being alone, but the truth is there are worse things than that. One of those is being around people who make you feel that way. I know this from experience.
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Fine
There is a limit to the solace of solitude. You will likely find yourself engaged in soliloquies and confronted with memories from the past that you would prefer to erase from your mind.
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There is a limit to the solace of solitude. You will likely find yourself engaged in soliloquies and confronted with memories from the past that you would prefer to erase from your mind.
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Christien
I grew up alone and not really having anyone to interact with, but sometimes when I'm with someone I enjoy spending a little extra time with someone or a person I'm with.
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I grew up alone and not really having anyone to interact with, but sometimes when I'm with someone I enjoy spending a little extra time with someone or a person I'm with.
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LaCarmencita
Meh. This is the first video of yours that doesn t resonate with me. I can be alone but as a social creature from a social culture, I miss socializing and community.
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Meh. This is the first video of yours that doesn t resonate with me. I can be alone but as a social creature from a social culture, I miss socializing and community.
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