The Dark Side of Pretty Privilege
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Date: 2024-05-23
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Comments and reviews: 20
princesslukeia
As a pretty & introverted person(I think I’m just ok, but people hype me up for whatever reason) it’s weird. I also have a thick hourglass body so I get creepy people coming near me all the time & sometimes I’m followed & it’s scary. This man literally came to me & my mom’s table at dinner last week & just stood in front of us staring at me & wouldn’t leave the manager literally kicked him out. I get stuff like that from creeps, I get told I’m very scary/mean or intimidating for just minding my business, or I’m assumed to be this amazing person(usually by men) off the bat just from being pretty when I’m just a normal person. I mostly get the mean or scary one often & get unnecessary hate. Girls will wanna fight me for no reason to which is also a negative. I’m extremely introverted & have social anxiety so I get stressed out constantly & rather not have a lot of attention so I hate it. Then when im struggling, people automatically assume my problems are non existent because they think I’m pretty. I’m automatically dismissed or belittled to the point that if I even have an issue about something, I’m being dramatic or told my life can’t be that bad. Then there are women that will only invite me to things because I’ll attract men & It’s annoying. Then dudes will only like me for very superficial reasons & wouldn’t hear or care about anything I have to say. You are often treated like a piece of meat or tool. All of this stuff is annoying so I stay in my house & go out every blue moon. When I’m shopping, I try to move as quickly as possible because shit can get scary & sometimes dudes will follow me down aisles to approach me. You can have the privilege honestly. I enjoy looking good & changing my hair & stuff for my own amusement & it’s not for attention. My mom is gorgeous & loves it, but she’s also extroverted & lived for it but me. it’s a no for me. I wasn’t always attractive growing up & I just started acknowledging I was pretty like last year. I experienced both sides & it’s not fun either way. I personally always feel like I’m in danger but my anxiety is through the roof so sometimes I might be tripping.
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As a pretty & introverted person(I think I’m just ok, but people hype me up for whatever reason) it’s weird. I also have a thick hourglass body so I get creepy people coming near me all the time & sometimes I’m followed & it’s scary. This man literally came to me & my mom’s table at dinner last week & just stood in front of us staring at me & wouldn’t leave the manager literally kicked him out. I get stuff like that from creeps, I get told I’m very scary/mean or intimidating for just minding my business, or I’m assumed to be this amazing person(usually by men) off the bat just from being pretty when I’m just a normal person. I mostly get the mean or scary one often & get unnecessary hate. Girls will wanna fight me for no reason to which is also a negative. I’m extremely introverted & have social anxiety so I get stressed out constantly & rather not have a lot of attention so I hate it. Then when im struggling, people automatically assume my problems are non existent because they think I’m pretty. I’m automatically dismissed or belittled to the point that if I even have an issue about something, I’m being dramatic or told my life can’t be that bad. Then there are women that will only invite me to things because I’ll attract men & It’s annoying. Then dudes will only like me for very superficial reasons & wouldn’t hear or care about anything I have to say. You are often treated like a piece of meat or tool. All of this stuff is annoying so I stay in my house & go out every blue moon. When I’m shopping, I try to move as quickly as possible because shit can get scary & sometimes dudes will follow me down aisles to approach me. You can have the privilege honestly. I enjoy looking good & changing my hair & stuff for my own amusement & it’s not for attention. My mom is gorgeous & loves it, but she’s also extroverted & lived for it but me. it’s a no for me. I wasn’t always attractive growing up & I just started acknowledging I was pretty like last year. I experienced both sides & it’s not fun either way. I personally always feel like I’m in danger but my anxiety is through the roof so sometimes I might be tripping.
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noobyasome5055
Hey, I'm in a bit of a dilemma. Not related to the video but I'm commenting here since it's the latest video and I'm hopeful for an answer. There's this girl that I used to sit next too and I saw her as a really good friend. Eventually, our teacher gave our class a new seating chart. A week into this seating chart, on Friday, something shocking happened. It was Halloween, and we were allowed to wear subtle costumes. She wore a mom costume and had a baby doll in a baby carrier. At PE, when we were running our laps, I slowed down because I reached the end. Someone who also sat at our table way back when ran past me, and said Your girlfriend is behind you and ran off. I didn't have a girlfriend, so I was confused and turned around. I saw that same girl that used to sit next to me, and she said, I kid you not, come say hi to your kid. I was FLABBERGASTED. I never had the thought she liked me or anything and I was completely shocked. I was a very awkward kid in 6th grade, so I just plain out said, no and started running to the end of my lap. We didnt interact for like two weeks, because when we were the last two in the classroom, leaving to go home, she was grabbing her stuff from her desk and when I walked by she said, I like your jacket, it looks good on you I had walked out of the classroom before I realized we were the last two kids in there, and she was talking to ME. She walked out of the class and walked by me, glancing behind me smiling a bit. I had thought she was weird when she did the whole mom thing, but when she gave me that compliment, I blushed a little and quickly walked the opposite way, EVEN THOUGH I had to go the same way as her lol. I started to like her ever since, and now, in 7th, she sits next to me in like three classes, and is with me in P. E. She constantly moves closer to me when sitting next to me, and half the time our elbows are touching but my awkward self normally flinches it away, and I know she notices it lol. I'm not sure whether she likes me, is being nice, or is just weird. Then again, her being weird is what made me eventually fall for her.
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Hey, I'm in a bit of a dilemma. Not related to the video but I'm commenting here since it's the latest video and I'm hopeful for an answer. There's this girl that I used to sit next too and I saw her as a really good friend. Eventually, our teacher gave our class a new seating chart. A week into this seating chart, on Friday, something shocking happened. It was Halloween, and we were allowed to wear subtle costumes. She wore a mom costume and had a baby doll in a baby carrier. At PE, when we were running our laps, I slowed down because I reached the end. Someone who also sat at our table way back when ran past me, and said Your girlfriend is behind you and ran off. I didn't have a girlfriend, so I was confused and turned around. I saw that same girl that used to sit next to me, and she said, I kid you not, come say hi to your kid. I was FLABBERGASTED. I never had the thought she liked me or anything and I was completely shocked. I was a very awkward kid in 6th grade, so I just plain out said, no and started running to the end of my lap. We didnt interact for like two weeks, because when we were the last two in the classroom, leaving to go home, she was grabbing her stuff from her desk and when I walked by she said, I like your jacket, it looks good on you I had walked out of the classroom before I realized we were the last two kids in there, and she was talking to ME. She walked out of the class and walked by me, glancing behind me smiling a bit. I had thought she was weird when she did the whole mom thing, but when she gave me that compliment, I blushed a little and quickly walked the opposite way, EVEN THOUGH I had to go the same way as her lol. I started to like her ever since, and now, in 7th, she sits next to me in like three classes, and is with me in P. E. She constantly moves closer to me when sitting next to me, and half the time our elbows are touching but my awkward self normally flinches it away, and I know she notices it lol. I'm not sure whether she likes me, is being nice, or is just weird. Then again, her being weird is what made me eventually fall for her.
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melaniescribbles
As an average-looking woman; I often point to this dark side on discussions of pretty privilege. Like, I do believe in the concept; I'm overweight, have to wear glasses to see, and I'm a goth with geeky interests; I'm at the very least not conventionally attractive, and people often don't take me seriously over my looks when compared to my more conventionally attractive friends. Like, there legit were times when if I actually had a point, they either had to rephrase what I said (I'm autistic, so it either was minsunderstandings due to that, so it sometimes was over that, or even repeat my words word for word on some occasions! Trust me, it's real. But I also heard them complaining more often about street harassment and objectification; something I didn't struggle with that often (I'm 30 years old and I think I've only been catcalled 4 times in my life so far, with 2 incidents being recent; I blame the 'big tddy goth gf' memes for catcallers being a little less scared over my appearance nowadays. Not to mention the common jealousy of the 'pretty people'; it should DEFINITELY tell you something that me actually treating them as humans beings often was a breath of fresh air to them. It's the actual reason why they kept me around, not to look better by comparison. So trust me, while the Chads and Stacey's do carry some privilege, it's not like they don't have their own set of problems to deal with. I should know; I actually talked to them and even befriended a few back in the day. And I would still do so; that whole 'geek vs jock' thing is so horribly overdone anyways.
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As an average-looking woman; I often point to this dark side on discussions of pretty privilege. Like, I do believe in the concept; I'm overweight, have to wear glasses to see, and I'm a goth with geeky interests; I'm at the very least not conventionally attractive, and people often don't take me seriously over my looks when compared to my more conventionally attractive friends. Like, there legit were times when if I actually had a point, they either had to rephrase what I said (I'm autistic, so it either was minsunderstandings due to that, so it sometimes was over that, or even repeat my words word for word on some occasions! Trust me, it's real. But I also heard them complaining more often about street harassment and objectification; something I didn't struggle with that often (I'm 30 years old and I think I've only been catcalled 4 times in my life so far, with 2 incidents being recent; I blame the 'big tddy goth gf' memes for catcallers being a little less scared over my appearance nowadays. Not to mention the common jealousy of the 'pretty people'; it should DEFINITELY tell you something that me actually treating them as humans beings often was a breath of fresh air to them. It's the actual reason why they kept me around, not to look better by comparison. So trust me, while the Chads and Stacey's do carry some privilege, it's not like they don't have their own set of problems to deal with. I should know; I actually talked to them and even befriended a few back in the day. And I would still do so; that whole 'geek vs jock' thing is so horribly overdone anyways.
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SirenSoiree222
As someone who is pretty and attractive, this just broke me because I related to all of this especially jealousy and the relationships one, and I would never think someone will understand.
Being pretty is NOT a PRIVILEGE and I SWEAR TO YOU ITS NOT ALWAYS GOOD
before I found out I had pretty privilege I CONSTANLY get put down all of the time by many jealous people (most attractive people don’t their pretty) I’ve gotten mean stares from other girls and it made me feel like I didn’t fit in which caused me to develop some mental problems and an extreme fear of rejection
(whenever attractive people call this out we get called narcissistic)
And my relationships oh don’t even ask, people are interested with being friends with me due to my looks, but they leave me straight away after a while too because they feel intimated and insecure around me and never speak to me again because people always assume I’m confident due to my looks.
And I’m still experiencing this crap even though I attract a lot a guys I’m still not complete, like I have trouble making friends, knowing who to trust. I have trouble maintaining friendships because of how scared and intimated they are of me, and some even started to spread rumours and be horrible, becuase of taking out their insecurities onto me.
Even though you may be surrounded by people, most of them want you for your looks and then leave you in the dump becuase they get insercure and it’s sad but true.
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As someone who is pretty and attractive, this just broke me because I related to all of this especially jealousy and the relationships one, and I would never think someone will understand.
Being pretty is NOT a PRIVILEGE and I SWEAR TO YOU ITS NOT ALWAYS GOOD
before I found out I had pretty privilege I CONSTANLY get put down all of the time by many jealous people (most attractive people don’t their pretty) I’ve gotten mean stares from other girls and it made me feel like I didn’t fit in which caused me to develop some mental problems and an extreme fear of rejection
(whenever attractive people call this out we get called narcissistic)
And my relationships oh don’t even ask, people are interested with being friends with me due to my looks, but they leave me straight away after a while too because they feel intimated and insecure around me and never speak to me again because people always assume I’m confident due to my looks.
And I’m still experiencing this crap even though I attract a lot a guys I’m still not complete, like I have trouble making friends, knowing who to trust. I have trouble maintaining friendships because of how scared and intimated they are of me, and some even started to spread rumours and be horrible, becuase of taking out their insecurities onto me.
Even though you may be surrounded by people, most of them want you for your looks and then leave you in the dump becuase they get insercure and it’s sad but true.
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psych2go
As someone who has never been given that kind of privilege, I really find it intriguing when I hear about that pretty privilege thing. It really isn't all good when you are good looking and the points depicted are just outright accurate. I've observed many good looking people throughout my social life and honestly, I can really see the advantages they have and also the disadvantages they can get, and to tell you something, it's really such a shame because people who wield good looks are almost always being handled superficially by others because of their looks. Overlooking their worth and underestimating their capabilities just because their looks dominated. However, one of the things I really hate is when a good looking person is being preferred and recognized more than someone who's literally wielding a vast arsenal of skills. Facile people will always prefer to acknowledge the good looking rather than the skilled especially at work. I have no qualms when someone is acknowledged for something, just that at least, the people who are actually worthy of recognition because of their capabilities should be acknowledged along with those who wield good looks. It's unfair to both sides, and practically and logically speaking, I'd rather look average than have that pretty privilege thing, I have something even far greater that I can offer than just looks anyway.
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As someone who has never been given that kind of privilege, I really find it intriguing when I hear about that pretty privilege thing. It really isn't all good when you are good looking and the points depicted are just outright accurate. I've observed many good looking people throughout my social life and honestly, I can really see the advantages they have and also the disadvantages they can get, and to tell you something, it's really such a shame because people who wield good looks are almost always being handled superficially by others because of their looks. Overlooking their worth and underestimating their capabilities just because their looks dominated. However, one of the things I really hate is when a good looking person is being preferred and recognized more than someone who's literally wielding a vast arsenal of skills. Facile people will always prefer to acknowledge the good looking rather than the skilled especially at work. I have no qualms when someone is acknowledged for something, just that at least, the people who are actually worthy of recognition because of their capabilities should be acknowledged along with those who wield good looks. It's unfair to both sides, and practically and logically speaking, I'd rather look average than have that pretty privilege thing, I have something even far greater that I can offer than just looks anyway.
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kamrancruz2742
Not to be mean or anything or downplay attractive peoples struggle, but I doubt any attractive person would choose to be ugly. As someone who has not been blessed with the best of looks, this kind of complaint feels a bit frustrating at times. Yes, maybe you are reduced to your looks because thats what society values most, but you literally have what society values most. Yes, theres a struggle to maintain what you have, but people everyday struggle just to get close to your average. Not saying its not a valid complaint or anything, not saying just because you have it good you cant complain. I understand why this video is important, unattractive peoples struggles are documented a lot more thoroughly and bringing attention to peoples struggles is a good thing, so we can treat others who might be struggling with compassion. Just a small part of me that is rubbed the wrong way by this. Like watching rich people complain about their lives. Maybe thats a problem with me though.
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Not to be mean or anything or downplay attractive peoples struggle, but I doubt any attractive person would choose to be ugly. As someone who has not been blessed with the best of looks, this kind of complaint feels a bit frustrating at times. Yes, maybe you are reduced to your looks because thats what society values most, but you literally have what society values most. Yes, theres a struggle to maintain what you have, but people everyday struggle just to get close to your average. Not saying its not a valid complaint or anything, not saying just because you have it good you cant complain. I understand why this video is important, unattractive peoples struggles are documented a lot more thoroughly and bringing attention to peoples struggles is a good thing, so we can treat others who might be struggling with compassion. Just a small part of me that is rubbed the wrong way by this. Like watching rich people complain about their lives. Maybe thats a problem with me though.
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benlamanis1032
as a person who has a strong platonic relationship with a girl who has pretty privilege for 5 years since early 2019, this video hits pretty close to home in an informative way.
I started out as a friend of hers via Xbox Live playing Fallout 76 with her, not knowing what she looked like at the time.
Early on in the friendship I had with her, she had a brain aneurysm that almost killed her and sadly, I was one of the only ones that checked on her to make sure she was doing ok, while recovering in hospital, not even her fiancee came to check on her. about a year after this, she started talking to me and ever since then through the video calls with her and her family and IRL meetups, she remains very close to me to this very day.
her birthday is very soon and I got her a present that she will cherish for years to come
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as a person who has a strong platonic relationship with a girl who has pretty privilege for 5 years since early 2019, this video hits pretty close to home in an informative way.
I started out as a friend of hers via Xbox Live playing Fallout 76 with her, not knowing what she looked like at the time.
Early on in the friendship I had with her, she had a brain aneurysm that almost killed her and sadly, I was one of the only ones that checked on her to make sure she was doing ok, while recovering in hospital, not even her fiancee came to check on her. about a year after this, she started talking to me and ever since then through the video calls with her and her family and IRL meetups, she remains very close to me to this very day.
her birthday is very soon and I got her a present that she will cherish for years to come
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paulinemphwiyo2857
Most people don’t seem to want to acknowledge the dark side of pretty privilege, or when you bring it up, you may appear tone deaf to people because they’re like yeah right, you’re pretty, what’s there to complain about. But I’ve noticed that it usually brings a lot of hate from other women, without them even knowing you. Unwanted attention that sometimes can be harassment and most men feeling entitled to my body and appearance. You’re no longer a person. Just reduced to your parts. And then it also causes you to become more self conscious because the more people fixate on your looks, you unconsciously will as well because that seems to be the only thing that causes give people to pay you any mind. Doesn’t help with the fact that society is OBSESSED with beauty either.
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Most people don’t seem to want to acknowledge the dark side of pretty privilege, or when you bring it up, you may appear tone deaf to people because they’re like yeah right, you’re pretty, what’s there to complain about. But I’ve noticed that it usually brings a lot of hate from other women, without them even knowing you. Unwanted attention that sometimes can be harassment and most men feeling entitled to my body and appearance. You’re no longer a person. Just reduced to your parts. And then it also causes you to become more self conscious because the more people fixate on your looks, you unconsciously will as well because that seems to be the only thing that causes give people to pay you any mind. Doesn’t help with the fact that society is OBSESSED with beauty either.
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ingrid5944
Two girlfriends of my cousins were jealous of me and wanted me to stay away from my cousins, people have thought that I'm arrogant cause sometimes I'm quiet and shy and have a RBF. If you're kinda superficial, it's okay to be pretty, if you're deep and intellectual and serious about what you defend, it's awful, cause they only see you for your external. I'm also a narcissists magnet and I just noticed this now, cause they want to use me for status or to show off, but they don't listen to me or treat me good for who I am. I'm not THAT PRETTY, but I know people have treated me bad because of my appearance (either for being pretty or for not being pretty as I get older and my body and face is not the same as it was before. I feel used.
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Two girlfriends of my cousins were jealous of me and wanted me to stay away from my cousins, people have thought that I'm arrogant cause sometimes I'm quiet and shy and have a RBF. If you're kinda superficial, it's okay to be pretty, if you're deep and intellectual and serious about what you defend, it's awful, cause they only see you for your external. I'm also a narcissists magnet and I just noticed this now, cause they want to use me for status or to show off, but they don't listen to me or treat me good for who I am. I'm not THAT PRETTY, but I know people have treated me bad because of my appearance (either for being pretty or for not being pretty as I get older and my body and face is not the same as it was before. I feel used.
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unknownpara7
Another thing what I found very crucial about pretty privalage is that
Those folks only care about their appearances and them only-- one reason being the praise and validation they've gotten -- but what they got wrong is when choosing a potential partner or dating someone their measuring stick (most of the time) is appearances only since they value this so much and this alone. So miss out on something much better and settle for ordinary many times.
Because both the parties prioritized appearance and good looks over anything else so Both are shallow deep inside. Ending up as a disaster.
Because to be something else as measuring stick, there must be something in the first place -- mattered more than the beauty and looks.
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Another thing what I found very crucial about pretty privalage is that
Those folks only care about their appearances and them only-- one reason being the praise and validation they've gotten -- but what they got wrong is when choosing a potential partner or dating someone their measuring stick (most of the time) is appearances only since they value this so much and this alone. So miss out on something much better and settle for ordinary many times.
Because both the parties prioritized appearance and good looks over anything else so Both are shallow deep inside. Ending up as a disaster.
Because to be something else as measuring stick, there must be something in the first place -- mattered more than the beauty and looks.
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hassanaziz2622
Okk, so i did experience pretty privilege in my primary, middle, elementary, high school and secondary high school. Mostly from teachers. They just gave me so much protocol which i never wanted. I was one of the top students of the class. No matter what, they just always compared me to other top students like mixing my names with them. Also, my friends did notice that teachers always gave their lecture while looking at me ( not all, but some teachers. One of my friends said that why is it always like that At that point, i got so much scared. I didn't want my friends to have this type of image. I also don't know what other fellowmates were thinking of me at that point. Well, I don't care about it. But still, it's really dark.
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Okk, so i did experience pretty privilege in my primary, middle, elementary, high school and secondary high school. Mostly from teachers. They just gave me so much protocol which i never wanted. I was one of the top students of the class. No matter what, they just always compared me to other top students like mixing my names with them. Also, my friends did notice that teachers always gave their lecture while looking at me ( not all, but some teachers. One of my friends said that why is it always like that At that point, i got so much scared. I didn't want my friends to have this type of image. I also don't know what other fellowmates were thinking of me at that point. Well, I don't care about it. But still, it's really dark.
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iridescent_skye
i can relate. my co workers bought pizza for me once they found out that it's my favorite. one co-worker gave me half a sack of red onions. he has a farm. the worst that happened to me was a voice call of a co-worker jacking off. he called my company issued sim card / mobile number and called at past 8pm when i was already sleeping. i thought there was a company related vehicular accident / emergency but naaah he just wanted to hear my voice as he was jacking off. it happened twice. my workshift ends at 5pm. since then i turned off my work phone once im sleeping. my job position then was an admin at logistics trucking company that delivers millions of pieces of medical products to the pier.
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i can relate. my co workers bought pizza for me once they found out that it's my favorite. one co-worker gave me half a sack of red onions. he has a farm. the worst that happened to me was a voice call of a co-worker jacking off. he called my company issued sim card / mobile number and called at past 8pm when i was already sleeping. i thought there was a company related vehicular accident / emergency but naaah he just wanted to hear my voice as he was jacking off. it happened twice. my workshift ends at 5pm. since then i turned off my work phone once im sleeping. my job position then was an admin at logistics trucking company that delivers millions of pieces of medical products to the pier.
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kaleidojess
I'm glad I blossomed into the person I am today, because I grew up not feeling pretty at all. I just don't like the extra attention and the random rudeness from women who think I want to steal their man. I thank God for how I look because I finally like myself, but it would be nice if people could just treat everyone with respect and kindness.
And don't get me wrong, when I see a beautiful person I too want to stare but at most I will look for one second, because I know how it feels to be stared at for extended periods of time, so if you want to stare at someone just be polite and recognize them as a human being not an object.
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I'm glad I blossomed into the person I am today, because I grew up not feeling pretty at all. I just don't like the extra attention and the random rudeness from women who think I want to steal their man. I thank God for how I look because I finally like myself, but it would be nice if people could just treat everyone with respect and kindness.
And don't get me wrong, when I see a beautiful person I too want to stare but at most I will look for one second, because I know how it feels to be stared at for extended periods of time, so if you want to stare at someone just be polite and recognize them as a human being not an object.
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RoninRen
Ugh, I hate how being treated with dignity is somehow it's own privilege(that those without the pretty privilege can at least get treated like co-workers/intellectual equals, and truthfully how you look is irrelevant to predators (&that's from my personal experience, basically by logic me being overweight, my acne, split ends &that I only wear basic baggy t-shirts and jeans basically means I'm unattractive) as when I testified against a mugger, it was how I found out(I didn't want to take any chances with a threat he made when I kept holding on to my bag during the struggle) he was facing charges for assaulting other women,
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Ugh, I hate how being treated with dignity is somehow it's own privilege(that those without the pretty privilege can at least get treated like co-workers/intellectual equals, and truthfully how you look is irrelevant to predators (&that's from my personal experience, basically by logic me being overweight, my acne, split ends &that I only wear basic baggy t-shirts and jeans basically means I'm unattractive) as when I testified against a mugger, it was how I found out(I didn't want to take any chances with a threat he made when I kept holding on to my bag during the struggle) he was facing charges for assaulting other women,
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timshen5542
personally, i think the discussion about pretty privilege boils down to this: people who have it are more noticeable, people who dont have it are less noticeable
being noticeable, depending on each person’s personality and/or circumstance, can be either a good thing or a bad thing
but most people think that whatever they dont have is better for them
as a guy who isnt conventionally attractive
i used to wish that i had pretty privilege all the time
now ive instead shifted my focus to trying to be happy with what i got
its not easy but i think in the long run itll be healthier for me
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personally, i think the discussion about pretty privilege boils down to this: people who have it are more noticeable, people who dont have it are less noticeable
being noticeable, depending on each person’s personality and/or circumstance, can be either a good thing or a bad thing
but most people think that whatever they dont have is better for them
as a guy who isnt conventionally attractive
i used to wish that i had pretty privilege all the time
now ive instead shifted my focus to trying to be happy with what i got
its not easy but i think in the long run itll be healthier for me
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Maddie-hx2rd
Well, I wouldn't say I'm pretty, but I do get some compliments on the streets or get looks. So being in the middle (not conventionally super attractive, but not conventionally ugly either) I think I'd rather go all-out and get the goods and bads of the pretty privileges than getting only the bads that come with being ugly. The only upside I can think of being ugly (which I experienced during puberty when I was pretty ugly) is that you know if people are actually there for you (because some of the friends who were with me then, are still with me almost 8 years later and appearence won't change that)
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Well, I wouldn't say I'm pretty, but I do get some compliments on the streets or get looks. So being in the middle (not conventionally super attractive, but not conventionally ugly either) I think I'd rather go all-out and get the goods and bads of the pretty privileges than getting only the bads that come with being ugly. The only upside I can think of being ugly (which I experienced during puberty when I was pretty ugly) is that you know if people are actually there for you (because some of the friends who were with me then, are still with me almost 8 years later and appearence won't change that)
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piratewizarddragon
People that are unconventionally looking in the other direction also suffer from some of this. I have had facial tattoos for over 30 years and people have made many assumptions because of them. I also have been assaulted and touched without consent because people didn't believe my tattoos are real. I once had someone spit on their hand and try and rub off my tattoos on my forehead because they couldn't accept the fact that they were real. Conventionally attractive and unattractive people are much more aware of the shallow superficial nature of humans in a general sense.
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People that are unconventionally looking in the other direction also suffer from some of this. I have had facial tattoos for over 30 years and people have made many assumptions because of them. I also have been assaulted and touched without consent because people didn't believe my tattoos are real. I once had someone spit on their hand and try and rub off my tattoos on my forehead because they couldn't accept the fact that they were real. Conventionally attractive and unattractive people are much more aware of the shallow superficial nature of humans in a general sense.
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TheBestInsects
It really is weird, but also interesting how our brains are wired and what it makes us do. I wonder why attractiveness makes us dismiss the other qualities of people. I also wonder why people harass others for their looks and see them as a possession why people do trends without a second thought, why we feel the pressure to look pretty before even asking ourselves if it would be worth it. I think many of us know now that society's expectations are messed up, but for some reason, I see many of us continue to follow them anyway.
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It really is weird, but also interesting how our brains are wired and what it makes us do. I wonder why attractiveness makes us dismiss the other qualities of people. I also wonder why people harass others for their looks and see them as a possession why people do trends without a second thought, why we feel the pressure to look pretty before even asking ourselves if it would be worth it. I think many of us know now that society's expectations are messed up, but for some reason, I see many of us continue to follow them anyway.
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juliaboskamp9666
Is there being seen as attractive a privillege yes it is there are multiple studie that say pretty people get better treatment be other people because they are seen as attractive, but it also has a drak side because without a darkside there can't be a light side.
When my brother was 15 multiple girls who were then him followed him around touch him without his consent because they thought they had a right to do that because he amarantly should like being touch by strange people because of the way he looks
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Is there being seen as attractive a privillege yes it is there are multiple studie that say pretty people get better treatment be other people because they are seen as attractive, but it also has a drak side because without a darkside there can't be a light side.
When my brother was 15 multiple girls who were then him followed him around touch him without his consent because they thought they had a right to do that because he amarantly should like being touch by strange people because of the way he looks
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dishatto
Yup I stopped when I realized all this- never had realized I had living by other people’s values my whole life. I don’t agree though that intelligence etc are overlooked but rather attractiveness makes people assume you have all the other qualities and when you don’t pay attention to your appearance they assume you don’t have any redeeming qualities. Everything else though you said is right on. You have to have very good boundaries and even if you do people will still cross them if you are attractive.
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Yup I stopped when I realized all this- never had realized I had living by other people’s values my whole life. I don’t agree though that intelligence etc are overlooked but rather attractiveness makes people assume you have all the other qualities and when you don’t pay attention to your appearance they assume you don’t have any redeeming qualities. Everything else though you said is right on. You have to have very good boundaries and even if you do people will still cross them if you are attractive.
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